Anton’s Fetifes Adventure - Chapter 7: The JAV Jake Adelstein?

Yes, this is it. The final chapter of our story. It was a long and hard (yes, haha) day at Fetifes, but the day still was not over when the wrestling match in the previous article ended. I was exhausted and tired from having to stand all that time. Even the brief respite by the wainscotting before the match started was not enough to soothe my aching feet, and so since there was still about half an hour left before the Fetish Festival officially ended, I made my way back down to the 3rd floor to rest on the tatami floor.

As I waited and checked in with the other ZENRA writers, I noticed people I’d seen at booths slowly trickling in to change back into more normal clothes. And then as more and more promoters, models, and sellers entered to congregate in the filming area, I realized they were gearing up to film a big goodbye message. June would probably be in that message, so I figured the best course of action was to wait for them to arrive, then help them out with putting their booth away before hopefully getting to grab dinner with them and their crew.

As such I dutifully waited as more and more people entered the tatami room. But when the Fetifes staff finished saying thank you and good bye to the camera, June still wasn’t around, and I worried I had made some sort of mistake. Had June and their crew already left?

I made my way up the stairs to the 4th floor and saw that while June and their team had not left, they were already in the midst of breaking down the set. More than that, when I asked if I could help out, June said that they had already done all the heavy lifting, so there was nothing for me to do.

I hate feeling useless though, so once I noticed how there were still plenty of tables that needed to be folded and brought to the storage area, I set about doing that. One advantage of my size is that I didn’t need any help in lugging the tables once they were folded up. And it felt good to be useful. Eventually everything was cleared out, and June and their crew were ready to leave with everybody else. All we needed to do was go down… the elevator.

Yes, if you recall my own misadventures with that infernal machine, you will perhaps realize the fear and trepidation I experienced once I learned that was where we would be taking the suitcases and luggage June needed to get down to the 1st floor. I half considered just taking the stairs, but not even I was strong enough to lug the massive suitcase of June’s I was now rolling around. So we found ourselves crowded in the elevator, jolted about from floor to floor until at last we reached the end of our journey and hurried out the second we reached the ground.

After that, we chatted for a bit. I let June know that I had a wonderful time at the Fetish Festival, which pleased them. And then I mentioned to June how, given how for this event I’d checked into a business hotel and handed out business cards and knew a decent amount of how to go about business there just from taking the trip to Tokyo enough times, that if I lived in Tokyo I could probably make JAV reporting a full-time job.

To my surprise, June said that that was a great idea. And for a second, seeing how serious they were about it, I started to wonder. If I found a cheap apartment, not even in Tokyo proper, but just in the greater Tokyo area, where a trip to Akiba or Shinjuku would take one hour instead of five or six, and cost me a thousand yen instead of… significantly more than that. If I did all that, and got serious about learning Japanese, hit the books and spent all my free time becoming fully fluent in the language. June would surely know strategies on how best to accomplish that, and might even be able to introduce me to some tutor or program to assist me. If I did all that, and spent my time going to even more events, becoming a regular that studios and staff recognized. If I did all those things, it was entirely within the realm of possibility that I could become the JAV Jake Adelstein, and grow into a trusted source on the JAV world just as Adelstein is the primary English source of knowledge on the yakuza.

But I don’t know if that would make me happy.

Don’t get me wrong. I love going to these events and meeting cool and interesting people. This job has changed my life in so many ways, all of them for the better. I feel truly blessed and grateful that I get to do this. But at the same time, this isn’t really something that I actively pursued so much as something I accidentally stumbled into. I have other dreams and ambitions that don’t involve JAV, and I know that if I get too deep into the JAV world, I might have doors closed to me in the worlds where those dreams and ambitions reside. 

I think writing about JAV is a lot like performing for JAV, in that with both, it can’t just be about the clams. You’ve got to have some desire beyond that that you can only really fulfill in the JAV world, because otherwise, after a while you may start to resent this thing that once gave you such joy and excitement. June is, by their own admission, a pervert. And they go to a place like Fetifes because they’re into all this fetish, kinky stuff. I, however, am not a fetishist. I’m just a small-town American fella who tries to go through the JAV world like Ted Lasso goes through the soccer world. And yes, I say soccer, because I’m proud to be an American, where at least I know I’m free (God I fucking hate that song so much).

I had a fun time at Fetifes. But I also realized that I’m very much vanilla in my sexual fantasies and desires. And that’s okay. Hell, my favorite hentai artist of all time, Yamatogawa, specializes in saucy, sexy content that’s labeled vanilla. But it also means that I’m probably not built for a life in JAV. I’m more into S1 than Sade Satou, and I think my career as a JAV writer will probably follow the same course as those S1 stars, where I do it for a few years before slowly phasing out of it and undertaking a new venture.

Also, since writing is freelance work, I get the shit taxed out of me for doing it. So, uh, yeah. I think a 9-to-5 regular workweek is better for a day job.

No. I’m not ashamed of my work as a JAV reporter, but I don’t think I want to make it my full-time job. So, because of that, I had to turn down June’s offer, though if they want me to cover another event like Fetifes before I return to America, I’ll be more than happy to do so. Hell, I shall leap at the chance. Despite turning them down though, I did manage to lift June’s spirits when I noticed Erika Momoyama and introduced the two of them. It seems Erika is a fan of June’s, as she reacted with a delighted squee upon meeting them. And though June already had dinner plans, I knew a great restaurant in the area, so I wasn’t too lamenting when we parted ways then and there.

One last punchline to end this all on, since you know I specialize in those. When I entered the restaurant doors, the fellow at the bar asked what my press badge was for, and I realized to my utter horror that I hadn’t returned it to the Fetifes event organizers. Face beet red with shame, I hastily put the badge in my pocket, and wondered how forgiving Fetifes would be once they realized I’d pilfered it, however unintentionally. Perhaps I shall never know, but if in a future article I reference getting rushed by a crowd of fiery, fisticuff-inclined Fetifes fellows, you shall know why.

So that’s the end of my wild, kinky weekend at Fetifes. In past articles I linked the social media of all the people I met, so for this last article, here is June’s official English page on Fetifes 2024 alongside the links to every last person I crossed paths with at this event. See you in the next one.

Tokyo Love District (https://tokyolovedistrict.com/fetifes25/)

June Lovejoy (https://twitter.com/June__Lovejoy)

Mari Aoi (https://twitter.com/ryuryunoryu)

Sade Satou (https://twitter.com/sade_sato)

LPC (https://twitter.com/lovepiececlub?lang=en)

Mion Hazuki (https://twitter.com/mionhazuki?lang=en)

Momochino (https://twitter.com/momotino?lang=en)

GUMI (https://twitter.com/0__GUMI__0)

Shion Republic (https://twitter.com/mami11191)

Runa Tsukinose (https://twitter.com/tsukinose_runa)

Erika Momoyama (https://twitter.com/eri0208i)

MeltyMelu (https://twitter.com/Meltymelt1022)

Sakurako (https://twitter.com/ooo0914ooo)

Yuka Hanyu (https://twitter.com/yukanekonyun)

Tomo Toudou (https://twitter.com/tomooaty)

Rutapi (https://twitter.com/TapiKo3)

Rinacy (https://twitter.com/rinyanpassan)

Nami Minami (https://twitter.com/373_cos)

Ao-chan (https://twitter.com/ao_harapeco22)

Tokyo Zentai Club (https://twitter.com/TOKYOZENTAICLUB)

Miori Hara (https://twitter.com/miori_hara)

Oto Momose (https://twitter.com/momoseoto)

Ayaka Mochizuki (https://twitter.com/ayaka_moon_)

Noa Amaharu (https://twitter.com/amaharu_noaa)