Panking's Top 10 Most Disappointing Movies Part 3
It's me Panking and I'm back at it again with yet another list of some of my most disappointing JAV films ever. Just as before I'll be going in order of least to most disappointing. Now to be fair, these movies aren’t the worst of the worst per se. Several of them are at the very least watchable, but their failure to live up to the hype will always leave a sour taste in my mouth. You go in expecting something grand but come out feeling let down and wondering what could have been. Now let's kick this off with my number 10 spot...
10. PPPD-863
"Office Harassment"
Starring "Hitomi"
I really, really wanted to like this more than I did. That cover is stunning and the premise sounds might enticing. It revolves around Hitomi playing a horny female boss overcome with lust who loves to seduce her workers and fuck them silly. This sounds fantastic, right? Well, sadly the outcome will leave you feeling underwhelmed. Now it's definitely not all bad. The general theme is great and results in Hitomi sporting some sexy OL attire. In addition, two of the sex scenes are pretty enjoyable with one even incorporating some POV camerawork to great effect. And her performance across the board is solid. But other issues here really bring down the experience.
One such issue is with the very wonky camerawork. Honestly, this camerawork feels quite amateurish. Often time it will be way too close to the action or just taking an extremely odd angle that will leave you wondering "why?". It's severe enough to greatly dampen the enjoyment of said scenes. Another major weakness is that some scenes are a complete waste of time. One of which is a remarkably awful paizuri scene marred by shotty camerawork and a terrible cumshot. Then there's a painfully bland solo masturbation scene that overstays its welcome which then leads to an underwhelming final sex scene. PPPD-863 is still enjoyable for sure but falls short of its true potential.
9. SSNI-102
"The Unwitting Temptation of Her Breasts and Pussy Perfectly Outlined in the Body Line of Her Tight Fitting Dress"
Starring "Nami Hoshino"
What a great cover right? Talk about eye-catching. It's too bad the film generally doesn't live up to it. The premise revolves around Nami Hoshino going out in public while wearing these super form-fitting dresses that showcase her wonderful curves. This then leads to random men being unable to control themselves as they fondle and fuck her. Some examples include a clerk in a convenience store or a bartender in a bar. Now with this film, there's no one huge glaring flaw but instead a series of smaller issues that combine to outweigh all the positives I have with it. I will say that the sex scenes are generally good and of course Nami looks outstanding here. Those dresses make for some killer eye candy.
One problem I have with the film is the overall submissive tone. Personally, I was hoping Nami would take on more of a neutral or maybe even dominant stance. But instead, most of these scenes have her yielding to the actors. This lead to her performance being pretty lackluster and forgettable. The pacing is also severely bloated with too many scenes wasting time on groping her and rubbing oil on her body. Another issue is that one scene is just a masturbation scene that goes on for 20 minutes. It's extremely dull. Lastly, I wish in the first sex scene that instead of slipping the dress off to fuck her that they would have cut a hole in it instead. All these minor issues make for a rather disappointing film. It's not terrible but definitely a letdown.
8. SDDE-540
"The Hot Girls At A Hot Springs Bath Who Will Soothe You With Her Pussies"
Starring "Aimi Yoshikawa", "Asahi Mizuno" & "Ren Hinami"
On paper, this film sounds like a good time right? Admittedly I'm not familiar with Ren Hinami but Aimi Yoshikawa and Asahi Mizuno should make for a great time. However, the outcome is less than stellar sadly. The overall premise is as simple as the title states with all three actresses playing the role of a bathhouse girl who help to relax their customers with their body in various ways. This mostly leads to some tittyfucking and of course full-on sex. It sounds decent enough but the execution leaves a LOT to be desired. I will say both Aimi and Asahi look terrific at least and at times their performances are enjoyable. But that's where most of the praise ends.
Now, what makes this film disappointing? One of the biggest issues I have is the complete lack of interaction between the cast. Now I'm not expecting them to be kissing and groping constantly but at least give us something. Instead, they barely acknowledge each other. What's even worse is that there is only ONE single scene with all 3 together and it's just a lousy paizuri scene. The rest of the scenes are just one-on-one sex scenes. And those are pretty underwhelming due to them using the same location and setup each time. The set variety is very weak all around. The result is an incredibly uninspired and lazy film that makes extremely poor use of its cast. A complete waste of time.
7. BTC-03
"Black Dick On The Road"
Starring "Haruki Sato"
I was really looking forward to this one before it released as her prior interracial video was one of my all-time favorites. So couple that with this film's premise of her traveling to the states and it should be a recipe for success right? Well not exactly. Just like I mentioned the plot revolves around Haruki Sato coming to the U.S to shoot an interracial film with some black actors. You're treated to some setup with her arriving and sightseeing a bit in Hollywood before the real action begins. This all sounds good but certain aspects were a big letdown sadly. The sex itself is pretty good all around and is quite intense. Not only that but these guys are pretty big so if you wanna see her get drilled by huge dicks, you're covered here.
The issues for me with this film begin with the tone of the scenes. Every scene features a submissive tone which is a real bummer. I'm not expecting Haruki to be completely dominant here but at least maybe a neutral stance. This all leads to her delivering a very lackluster performance where she is very whiny and submissive as a result. I'm sure for some that's a positive but definitely not for me. The other issue I have is that Haruki really started to let herself go at this point in her career. I love meaty actresses but this is pushing it a bit. Haruki was at a near-perfect weight before this in my eyes but this is a little too much. Overall, BTC-03 is a slightly frustrating film that under different circumstances could have been something far greater.
6. PPPD-898
"My Girlfriend's Older Sister Tempted Me With Her Big Tits"
Starring "Nene Tanaka"
Nene Tanaka is an actress that I recently started checking out. She's cute, petite, and busty. So imagine my excitement when I learned about this film which is a part of one of my favorite series ever. However, the end result left me feeling pretty underwhelmed. Most of you reading this are probably familiar with this particular series already and know what to expect but I'll briefly explain it. The plot centers around Nene seducing her sister's boyfriend with her big tits. It's that simple. I expected big things from this film but sadly it underwhelmed in a major way. It's not all terrible as her performance is solid enough and she does look terrific. But it falters in one of the most critical aspects of this series, risk.
One of the most exciting elements of this series is indeed the presence of risk involved. Usually with her sister right nearby and the pair in danger of being found. It's a key selling point that is virtually missing here. There's a very brief scene of her groping his dick with her feet under the table and a paizuri scene with her sister in bed but nothing beyond that. The few sex scenes themselves have no risk at all except for maybe 2 minutes at the very end. This results in most of the action feeling very vanilla and bland. Couple that with some bloated pacing and you've got one of the most forgettable films in this entire series. Nene Tanaka is great but this film is a far cry from what it could have been.
5. RCTD-350
"The New Employee Is A Basilisk Man"
Starring "Akari Niimura"
Everyone loves Rocket, right? Their creativity knows no bounds and they always make some of the most original videos around. While this film definitely scores points for originality the actual quality leaves something to be desired. The premise centers around a bitchy female boss with a new employee who turns out to be a "basilisk" that can turn people to stone with just one glare. So he turns his sights towards his boss and she starts to change to stone as the film progresses. This all leads to the end when he fucks her while she's frozen like a statue. It's bizarre for sure. Rocket does a fantastic job with her makeup helping to sell the overall premise. Plus her performance is rather convincing too especially when she's frozen.
Now while the concept is original and her acting is great, the actual substance is a huge letdown. Unfortunately, the film is only 1 hour and 40 minutes long which is a real shame given the potential of this plot. It definitely could have been longer. The real glaring problem here though is the action which is downright awful. There are just 3 scenes in all consisting of two blowjobs and a sex scene. The sex scene is average at best but the other two scenes are underwhelming. Doesn't help that the pacing is terrible. The film spends literally a whole 20 minutes just showcasing her body and paint job. RCTD-350 is such as novel concept that just goes completely to waste. A rare huge miss from Rocket.
4. SNIS-596
"Super Golden Body Cosplayer"
Starring "Kirara Asuka"
That's a pretty enticing cover, right? It's a shame that the outfit featured there is a part of the only worthwhile scene in this entire film. Cosplay films can be rather hit-or-miss imo and SNIS596 is a big miss. Like most cosplay videos the plot centers around Kirara Asuka dressing up as various anime/video game characters and roleplaying as them within their respective universe. Now I do appreciate the fact the film incorporates the worlds of each cosplay outfit to help make each scene feel fresh and unique. And as I mentioned the scene with the cover outfit is really good and stands as the best offering here. Unfortunately, it's all relatively downhill from here.
For starters, her performance is pretty mediocre at best. She's mainly submissive throughout the entire film. This isn't a bad thing inherently but she's not compelling at all and lacks any real energy or engagement whatsoever. Just completely dull across the board. Next up is the action which is terrible. Two scenes are just average handjob scenes and two other scenes are back-to-back masturbation scenes. They're a complete waste of time and squander some really nice outfits. And I gotta say Kirara cosplaying as Cammy just doesn't work. She's nowhere near meaty enough for that. SNIS-596 boasted some real potential but due to a lousy performance and abysmal action, it falls way short of expectations.
3. BDA-041
"Black Impact The Female Sniper"
Starring "Yui Hatano"
As far as cover bamboozled goes, this ranks pretty high as one of the most egregious I've ever come across. The premise is pretty simple as it centers around Yui playing a female sniper who inadvertently gets captured and fucked against her will. Nothing too complicated. You've probably seen this type of setup before in many other films. It doesn't really do anything different and feels pretty bland overall. Yui looks decent in her catsuit at least, that she only wears for one single masturbation type scene. What a waste. She delivers a solid submissive performance and plays her role well enough.
But one look at the cover and you see the title, “Black Impact”, and probably think this is Yui’s first interracial video. Well, you would be wrong. In all my years of watching JAV this may be one of the dumbest bamboozles ever. There are no black guys here at all. Instead, it's just some standard Asian guys with shades on to cover their eyes and they just rub charcoal on their skin to darken it a bit. That’s literally it and it's downright laughable. Why’d they even do a concept like this thinking they could fool anyone is beyond me. When I first saw this I was hoping for something much different but instead got played for a fool. The result is an absolute waste of time.
2. MIAA-379
"I Was Pissed Off After Getting Fired From My Job, So I Tied Up My Bitchy Lady Boss And Pumped Her Full Of Love Potions And Fucked Her"
Starring "Kurea Hasumi"
After coming off an amazing 2020 I was expecting great things from Kurea Hasumi in 2021. This was one of her first big films of the year and with a title like this, my expectations were set pretty high. But after giving it a watch it proved to be one of the most disappointing films I've seen in recent memory. Kurea Hasumi plays a female boss role who is very bitchy. As a result, one of her employees devises a scheme to tie her up and give her lots of love potions and fuck her. But she proves to be too much for him to handle and turns the tables. On paper, this sounds like a home run but in execution, it falls way short of its potential. On the plus side, her performance is just as great as you'd hope for and the last sex scene is very good.
On the negative side, nearly everything else falls flat. The action overall is terrible with a bland masturbation and blowjob scene that are absolutely forgettable. Not only that but the sex scenes themselves have severely limited position variety. This leads me to the pacing which is all over the place. The first sex scene for example is way too brief while the filler scenes overstay their welcome. Another production issue is the drab set design as every single scene uses the exact same room. It's so tiring and makes the film much more repetitive. This easily could have been one of Kurea's best films in recent time but instead ends up a massive disappointment with tons of wasted potential.
1. WNZ-389
"Amateur Participation Plan! Shall Rio Hamasaki Give You A Cherry Boy Graduation?"
Starring "Rio Hamasaki"
The fan thanksgiving genre is a big favorite of mine and normally Rio Hamsaki’s entries are always a safe bet to be some of the best around. She's such a natural in these types of roles but this film misses the mark by a longshot. As the title states, it’s all about Rio Hamasaki giving virgins their first sexual experience. Are they actually virgins? It's hard to say but some do seem pretty awkward which does help lend some believability at least. Now I will say this film isn't a total loss. Rio Hamasaki does look very nice as a whole and her performance is up to her usual standard. She's pretty engaging and boasts great energy.
But all that isn't nearly enough to save the film from some massive blunders. I hope you like fixed camerawork because several scenes use it exclusively here making for some truly awful angles that don't give the viewer any good angles at all. The film is also incredibly bloated with a whopping 3 hours with too much fluff dragging the scenes down. Those scenes themselves aren't even that enjoyable really. There are only 2 sex scenes here that are way too brief and in an extremely unsatisfying fashion. The guys simply just cum inside a condom. No real cumshots at all here. It's just so lame overall. The concept is nice and Rio looks stunning but that's it. This film disappoints in nearly every way. Don't even bother.
Comments
By Syndrome @ October 30th, 2024
By WoodOfTheRisingSun @ November 27th, 2020
By Panking @ February 22nd, 2021