Panking's 2022 Retrospective: Top 10 Worst Films of 2022
There were plenty of duds in 2022. Whether it be laughably bad debuts, terrible themes, or lousy production values. All these films suffer from multiple issues that really can't be overcome. Overall I had a much easier time deciding on this list than my best of 2022. While I watched many average films this year, only a small amount really stood out as truly awful. With all that out of the way, let's kick this off with my number 10 least favorite film of the year.
10. SSIS-529
J-Cup Close Contact ASMR Lewd Talk Special!
Starring Mei Washio
I'm sorry but I just don't understand the whole ASMR craze. I've tried it several times and it does absolutely nothing for me. So naturally, an entire video dedicated to it was bound to disappoint me and it definitely did. I don't think the setup here requires too much explanation. It basically centers around the theme of ASMR with loads of POV and dirty talk designed to tickle your ears. A few scenes do feature a simple scenario like casting her as a masseuse or having her play your girlfriend. But beyond that, it's extremely straightforward. Admittedly a major reason this film lands here on my list is due to the overwhelming focus on ASMR which I loathe. However, there are a few other issues that hold it back as well.
One problem I have is that there's a lengthy dildo play scene at the beginning. She's at least pretty expressive during this scene but it's still dull as hell. Another issue I have is with the overall pacing. For example, the paizuri scene is heavily weighed down with all the ASMR bullshit as it not only takes too long to get going but also features a lame gimmick of her using a binaural microphone. The pacing is a bit better in the other scenes but still is a bit dragged out. And as far as her performance goes she's about average at best. Her facial expressions can be solid but still lacking in enthusiasm. I know some out there will enjoy this film but certainly not me.
9. HMN-185
At The End Of A Month's Abstinence... There Is A Creampie That Blows Your Mind
Starring Mina Kitano
This is a film that really left me scratching my head. It takes a routine setup that's been done before but takes it in a direction that really left me feeling a bit uncomfortable The premise revolves around Mina abstaining from sex for a month while documenting it on camera. At first, she's only able to watch a couple have sex before she's finally able to join in herself. It's just not a setup that I care for especially since we know it's likely staged as at the time of this film's release she was also shooting for Fitch so no way she actually abstained from sex. Now for what it's worth the action here isn't too bad at least complete with three sex scenes featuring Mina and one where she's merely a spectator.
That particular scene has to be one of the most puzzling scenes I've come across all year. She just sits there and cries while watching them have sex. She consistently tries to get the actor's attention while making sobbing faces and shedding tears. I have no idea what they were thinking. The rest of her performance isn't much better. She has a few nice moments occasionally but overall she's not her usual self and is instead quite whiny. On a more positive side, the technical aspects are decent with adequate lighting and good camerawork besides some minor static camera use that's not too egregious. But aside from that, there aren't many positives to talk about. It's just an uncomfortable and unsatisfying watch all around.
8. MKMP-441
Fully Naked Bunny Titty Fuck Harem
Starring Monami Takarada, Ruka Inaba & Yuria Yoshine
Millions's multi-actress releases have to be the most consistently underwhelming that I've ever seen in JAV. Even though I set my expectations to mild, I was still let down. The plot centers around you as a customer at a bar filled with several busty bunnygirls as they treat you to some first-class service. All this while being entirely shot in POV. It all sounds great on paper but the execution is a huge miss. For starters, the production values are quite lousy. Every scene minus one takes place in the same exact room on top of the lighting setup being very similar each time. This all makes the scenes feel super repetitive. Plus the pacing is a little bloated with some scenes being dragged out for too long.
If only the problems stopped there but they don't sadly. The action is very underwhelming across the board. It consists of a group handjob/paizuri scene, a solo Ruka Inaba sex scene, a threesome sex scene with Monami and Yuria, and lastly a foursome with the full cast however only Yuria actually has sex. It's all just so disappointing. This film wastes such a great cast by only featuring them together for a few scenes that aren't even that great anyway. Couple this with all 100% fake cumshots and it's just so unsatisfying. I will say performance wise they all do fine but there isn't too much chemistry between them. I honestly could've picked any of their group films from this year to put here but this one was just a bit worse than the rest. What a dud.
7. EYAN-183
A Pair Of Married Women In Sexless Marriages Swap Husbands. Super Heavyweight Colossal Tits And Huge Asses On Both Sides To Work That Cum Out During A Nympho Harem Threesome
Starring Maria Nagai & Miina Wakatsuki
There were quite a few disappointing 3P films from 2022 but perhaps the worst of them all was EYAN-183. It went beyond just sheer disappointment into outright bad territory. Now despite the title implying there's a plot here, there really isn't. The film just focuses on these two having sex with a few guys in a hotel room. It's extremely straightforward which isn't always a bad thing but the execution here is tragic. The production values are easily the worst aspect of the film and ruin any potential it had. The settings are extremely bland as each scene takes place in nearly the exact same dull white room. Making matters worse is the flat lighting that is once again the same throughout every single scene. It's all so repetitive and doesn't accentuate their curves at all.
If that's not enough the camerawork is equally awful. The shots are either way too close or taken from confounding angles, usually from down low which gives you a poor view of the action. As a whole, the production feels very amateurish. The action itself is just average at best. It features two threesome sex scenes and a paizuri scene across a two-hour runtime which results in some lousy pacing. Especially with the paizuri scene considering it's 40 minutes long and ends with a fake cumshot. In fact, most of the loads here are sadly fake. And to top it all off there's barely any interaction between the pair although individually their acting is at least fine. It's just a complete dud from top to bottom and is better left in the trash.
6. IPX-957
Endless Ejaculation Soapland
Starring Rin Hachimitsu
Soapland films are easily some of my least favorite but occasionally one will manage to impress me. This film is definitely not one of those cases. Plot-wise there's very little going on beyond the fact that it's soapland themed. All the typical bells and whistles are here as this film doesn't do anything different whatsoever. This film is a perfect example of why I hate this genre. It's so painfully repetitive. It feels like you're watching the same scenes over and over. This is largely due in part to the production values. Three out of four scenes reuse the exact same room with nearly the same lighting setup as well. It's awful. Not to mention the pacing is a bit dragged out thanks to all the soapland fluff such as the constant massaging and lotioning play.
If nothing else the action is at least decent. It features about four to five scenes in all and each one is a sex scene. The range of positions is particularly nice but at times it can be difficult to tell when one scene ends and another begins as each one looks exactly the same as the rest. Another more personal issue I had is Taku the actor. He isn't as unbearable as he sometimes can be in this film but he's still my least favorite actor and it certainly impacted my enjoyment. Especially when he's in two of the scenes. And unfortunately, her performance is pretty lousy. It's mainly her expressions as they feel rather awkward and stiff. This film really just exemplifies why I dislike this genre, especially with its terrible monotonous technical aspects.
5. DOA-020
Purunpurun Bursting Tits K-Cup Goddess Descent
Starring Ruka Inaba
Talk about an utterly ridiculous photoshopped cover. This particular studio is notorious for it. They try to bait you in with this over-the-top cover but don't be fooled as what lies beneath is one of the most mundane and forgettable films I've seen all year. I'm not entirely sure what the exact premise is here but it ultimately casts Ruka into a more submissive role. This leads me to her performance. She isn't completely awful but she's pretty forgettable. There are a few moments where she's expressive and energetic but more often than not she's reserved to being whiny and playing a sub role. Not my cup of tea.
Her performance is only the beginning of the negatives as the action is just as mediocre. It consists of two sex scenes, two paizuri scenes, and a simulated sex scene that ends up being one of the dumbest scenes in any recent JAV film. It's just Ruka dry-humping the air for about 20 minutes. I realize it's designed so you the viewer can self-insert into the scene but half the time it's not even shot in POV rendering it completely pointless. The other scenes are fine at best but the production values really bring them down. The worst offender is the incredibly drab lighting that really dulls out the final sex scene. Overall it's just a complete waste of time even for the most diehard Ruka Inaba fans. Don't bother with this one.
4. ONSG-049
A Big Tits Delivery Health Call Girl Double Huge Tits Cast
Starring Yuria Yoshine & Shiori Tsukada
Don't be fooled by this tantalizing cover. While it's very appealing, the actual film itself is anything but. There's really no plot to speak of here. It just focuses on Shiori and Yuria having sex inside a hotel room. It's incredibly basic and straightforward with no interesting aspects at all. That's not always a bad thing as vanilla films can still be great if everything else is executed well enough. Sadly, that's not the case here. It boasts four scenes in all consisting of two one-on-one sex scenes, a threesome paizuri scene, and lastly a threesome sex scene. Featuring the pair together for only half the film is such a waste especially when one scene is just a lousy tittyfuck ending with a fake cumshot.
It doesn't get any better with the solo sex scenes as they're painfully forgettable. The threesome sex scene isn't much better as it's a little too brief, features barely any interaction between the pair, and is once again just really dull. It doesn't help that the production values are painfully underwhelming too. The hotel room setting is drab and the pacing is slow but the lighting is worst of all. In one scene it's way too bright and in another, it's incredibly bland and flat. It doesn't highlight their curves at all. I can't forget to mention how lackluster their acting is too as a whole. This is such a waste of a good pairing. Watch CJOD-346 instead for a much better Shiori and Yuria collab. There is just nothing redeeming here at all.
3. SSIS-357
Enjoying God's Tits and Beautiful Face - Full Body Licking and Thick Kissing
Starring Rara Anzai
After taking three months off Rara Anzai would return with this massive dud of a film. And sadly enough it was her last at the time of this writing. Anyway, this is a very basic and vanilla film centered around the theme of kissing. That's pretty much all there is to it. I for one cannot stand this theme. It's just not appealing to me to watch her sloppily kiss an actor over and over. It's even more downhill from there starting with the action. It features two sex scenes, a handjob scene, and lastly a paizuri scene. Those last two scenes are absolutely worthless mostly due to her painfully lackluster performance(more on that later) and weak cumshots.
The sex scenes are average at best but even then they're plagued by the kissing theme getting in the way and the slow pacing which amounts to just a little over 20 minutes of actual sex altogether. It's ludicrous. Her performance is as mediocre as you'd expect suffering from the usual low-effort enthusiasm and weak facial expressions. Also physically, I think her body has seen better days. All the weight loss has taken a toll on her breasts which are now quite deflated and she's remarkably skinny now too. If I have anything nice to say I guess the production values are solid with good lighting in particular. But overall this is just painfully drab and a complete waste of time. Even if you enjoy kissing, look elsewhere. This is as much fun as watching paint dry.
2. SSIS-312
Unpai
Starring Unpai
I know this is like beating a dead horse by now but seriously, this film is a complete joke. This is easily one of the most overhyped debuts ever in JAV. Regardless of how she's doing now, this film didn't come anywhere near to living up to the expectations placed on it by S1 at all.The big notable aspect of Unpai was that she was a massive star on TikTok with over 3.7 million followers who wanted to partake in JAV to "save men" which is just absolute nonsense. S1 built up her debut to extreme heights but it failed to deliver entirely. While the quality of the film is extremely questionable, S1's trick did pay off because this film garnered a ton of attention and sales. Anyway, as a debut film itself, it's pretty awful.
By far one of the film's most egregious issues is that there's only one sex scene and it's not until the very end. Making matters worse it's over an hour long and painfully dragged out. Beyond that, there's an utterly terrible paizuri scene as her chest isn't really well equipped for it and her performance is super lackluster. Lastly, there's a blowjob scene that is just average at best. The film is nearly three hours long with only three scenes with any action in them. The rest is just focused on interviewing her and tickling her tits. It's incredibly boring all around. Now don't get me wrong I think she looks decent all around but this film is a horrible debut. It's good to hear that her films have improved but this video makes an awfully weak first impression.
1. CEMD-133
Age Difference Lesbian Sex Revealed! Alice Kisaki With Chisato Shoda. A Woman Gets To Know Her First Experiences Of Lesbian Pleasure
Starring Alice Kisaki & Chisato Shoda
I was extremely skeptical of an Alice and Chisato collab. These two are nothing alike while Chisato is old enough to be Alice's mama. My suspicions turned into reality after watching it as it turned out to be a colossal misstep. As you can probably guess there is no real plot to speak of here. Instead, it's all about Chisato giving Alice her first lesbian experience on camera. The quality of a lesbian film largely hinders on the chemistry between the pair but unfortunately, It's pretty much non-existent here. Chisato is okay at best but Alice is very stiff throughout and seems a bit uncomfortable at times. I think the age difference certainly plays a role in that. This lack of chemistry really destroys any slight potential the film had.
Regarding the action, it's about what you expect from this genre. There are only three scenes in all not counting a BTS scene at the very end. All the scenes mainly consist of the usual kissing, fondling, and fingering with the final scene featuring some strap-on use. The strap-on scene isn't too bad but it's way too brief with the other scenes feeling very forgettable thanks to the lack of proper chemistry. The production values as a whole are fine at best and I did enjoy the BTS scene at the very end. But that's about all the positives I can find. CEMD-133 is by far one of the worst lesbian films I've seen, maybe ever. Finding any redeeming qualities here is a real struggle. What an absolute blunder and deserving of the title of the worst film of 2022.
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